June 23, 2006

Boo, Yelling Guy...

this might sound vain, but i'm glad that i'm me. not so much because i'm stunningly handsome and charismatic (cue laugh track), but because i can speak convincingly without yelling. now the ability to get my point across without twisting the volume wheel 25 clicks might not seem like a big deal, but there is a guy on our floor (let's call him Yelling Guy) who reminds me why it's so nice to be me.

every time i walk near Yelling Guy's office, the door is slightly ajar and i can hear his accented voice screaming. and when i say 'screaming,' i don't mean speaking loudly or harshly, but really YELLING. like it always sounds like he's firing somebody for incompetence. i always expect Yelling Guy to be cursing people out, throwing chairs, and kicking computer monitors. he has the type of voice that i used to associate with extra laps on the track and suicide drills until i puke. yet, whenever i walk by (cringing, afraid that he's going to pull me into his Yelling Abode to yell at me), it turns out that he's having a very civil meeting that (if i was deaf) is no different from any work meeting that i've been in. it's actually very similar to talking to someone who was just at a really loud concert. and yes, i have considered the remote possibility that Yelling Guy moonlights as a security guard at heavy metal concerts and has no ear drums left. Yelling Guy yells so much that I really can't discount this possibility.

one of the best things that i ever learned (and i can't remember where i learned it, maybe from stoops) is that if you want people to listen to you, speak softer not louder. speaking softly gives your mind room to think and convinces other people to listen. plus, no one wants to be the asshole who speaks over people (unless he's the asshole who speaks over people), so speaking softly discourages people (even Yelling Guy, probably) from interrupting you and generally looking like a dick. i've done heavy research and found that if you can find a way for people to avoid looking like complete jerk-offs, they'll take it.

so what about Yelling Guy? well, i'm pretty grateful for him. i like to walk by Yelling Guy's office in the middle of the day, both for self-gratification and a good laugh. i'm serious! i'll walk by his office, snickering to myself about how ridiculous the yelling is. in fact, i'm going to do it right now, because i could use the humor. i just need to walk quickly though, or else he might start yelling at me. oh, Yelling Guy...

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At 6/23/2006 05:39:00 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hey, at least he's got an office...


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